[THIS IS WHAT HE MEANS WITH THE STRANGENESS what does that even mean?? pimp you out]
I know many men here who use swords. And speak normally. [HE DOESN'T SOUND OLD] You're being unreasonable. He's not going to replace you, he offered his help and Sansa accepted it. [Meaning even if Jon wanted to (which he doesn't) he couldn't kick Dave out without going against Sansa's decisions.]
So... what's the point of me being anything court appointed if I'm not the one being looked to when magicky stuff happens. Or is needed. Isn't that the whole point of being the court wizard? Huh?
[Okay, yes. He was hurt and kind of paranoid that they were trying to get rid of him. After he'd done so much? After he cared? Rude, guys.]
You're the one who acts like those titles don't mean anything! You've made it perfectly clear you don't like authority, or listening to it. [He sounds frustrated. It feels like when Pyp started getting mad at him all the time, after he became Lord Commander. He doesn't want that again but he's... also not very good at preventing it...]
Titles are crap and don't mean anything. But you guys gave me a job. And now you're calling in someone else to do it without even talking to me. No one asked me to do anything. I've been killing myself trying to learn how to use my shard to help boost my magic. I've been trying to figure out ways to defend Coth before anyone gets to the gates. But hey, whatever, right? Might as well just let in anyone with a magic ring who does shit.
[Literally on the verge of pulling his hair out.] Work with him, then. The city's safety ought to mean more than any one man's wounded pride. Like as not, that was what my lady sister considered when she accepted his offer.
Well it would have been nice if someone had told me first!
[That was the sound of Stiles hanging up before he threw his locket across the room. He was having a childish fit of temper and feeling less than useless lately. This hadn't helped.]
you thought you'd seen the last of me BUT I FOUND SOME TIME
[The thing is, Jon had tried to wallow in his usual self-flagellating, self-pitying nonsense, but it had... sucked. He'd gotten used to his loneliness on the Wall: he'd missed Sam and Pyp and Grenn, he'd missed the mess hall and not feeling like he was drowning every waking second of the day, but he'd still sent them all away. He'd still followed the advice of his lord father, and the Old Bear, and Maester Aemon too. They were wise, he'd thought. Better men than me.
But Stiles had reminded him what it meant to have friends to talk with, someone who wasn't family, someone he could look at without thinking you're dead, and you're dead, and they broke you, and you don't know it but you're fate is worse than any of the others. Only he lost that too because he thought Stiles had meant it when he went on about not caring about titles or court positions or things of that nature.
The problem being, of course, is that Jon is too prideful to just come crawling back with an apology. So instead he opens with:] If you didn't know, Gendry has been enchanting weapons with the magic the dwarves taught him in Troichean Beinn. [There. Magic things, officially reported to the court wizard.] With... fire, and such.
[Sometimes, Stiles wanted to just smack Jon in the face with a dead... thing. Maybe a fish. Yeah, like that Monty Python troupe. It'd suit him, with that froofroo accent. 'Hello, I'm Jon Snow with a pretty accent and all the women love me and tra la la look how strong I am. Kiss my royal rear'.
Now was one of those times.]
Dude...
[He wasn't sure if Jon was being condescending or trying to apologize. He should be better at figuring that out, but he was still just a teenager, as was Jon, and they could both be dumb.]
And?
aww yiss everybody goes down in an undignified lump on the floor
[Jon huffs. He's fairly certain Stiles is making this difficult on purpose.]
I thought you wished to know of such things. [He should have brought a pizza, clearly.] Or do you not wish to hear them from me? [Are u breaking up with him Stiles??]
[He huffed himself, moving away from the door, but pushing it open to indicate that Jon should come in.]
Look, I know what Gendry does. That's not my thing. He's got the whole sword thing down, just like you've got the whole naked wolf thing down. Whatever. That's not the point. The point is that...
Look, it's like this. You call in a plumber to do a job on your house, right? And you contract this plumber to do your house every time there's a problem. So the plumber's driving by your block one day and sees you have another plumber parked outside and some new guy is just... touching all your pipes.
[Usually Jon just glosses over Stiles' nonsense words and assumes their meanings, but this one seems fairly essential to understanding the point he's trying to make.]
What's a--? Oh, Jesus, Jon. It's a guy that specializes in like, taking care of the pipes and plumbing in-- right. Right. No indoor plumbing. Fuck.
Okay, stables, then. You do horses. You have the head horse guy doing his horse thing and someone else is coming around feeding the horses something new. That's basically what this comes down to, okay? It's not about titles. It's--
This is my job, okay? This is why I came here, with you and Sansa and Gendry and Arya and Malia. I came here to do my magic... thing to try to do what I can for you. I've been trying to figure out stuff, practicing magic extensions with my shard, I've been trying, man. And it's not even that this guy's here. It's that no one thought to say "hey, maybe we should see if Stiles is doing something like this or if these guys are compatible". You just... you brought in someone to do what I'm supposed to be doing. That makes me pretty superfluous, bro.
I'd have liked to ask, only you've been cross with me for days and won't talk without being chased. [He'd meant to have all three of them do that pizza thing that he and Stiles used to do, a sort of nerd wizard setup (way to crush his dreams of being a matchmaker, Stiles.) But Jon basically hounds anybody who can swing a sword without cutting themselves to take the time and spar with him, he'd thought maybe Stiles and Dave would have the same sort of enthusiasm for other magical people. Clearly not.]
Edited (it's that "forgetting words" time of night again) 2015-01-29 09:11 (UTC)
I was busy. I had to be over at Glaem learning how to do the whole... thing. Did you know I can make it so you can't get hurt by a sword? Did you? Bet you didn't.
[He might have, if it had been brought up. But wishes and fishes and blah blah blah. Besides, Dave wore old man shoes. And he was older. There was clearly something wrong with him. =|]
[Jon stares. Man when was he supposed to talk to Stiles about Dave if not after the Dave incident?]
You have. I've been trying. You bloody hung up on me last time we spoke, and before that you were avoiding me. [That gives Jon pause though. He remembers their first talk, in the hall. When all Stiles could do was blow bubbles with his staff.] That-- invulnerability potion?
[Maybe before Stiles came across him smearing his magic all over the place?]
I was not avoiding you. I was working. What do you think I do all day, Jon, just watch what you do and then run away when you're looking for me? Maybe scratch my butt all day?
And no. It's not that. It's from my shard. But I've been working on that too. All I've been doing since I've come here is try to... make it all better.
[Hey it's not Jon's fault Dave gets right down to business! It's the old man shoes. They are powerful motivators, clearly.]
So you're too busy working to have a conversation, but you're angry because men don't talk to you. [Jon is this close to throwing up his hands in frustration.] Aye, I know it. I never said you weren't doing enough.
Dude, that locket poke has been the first time I've heard a peek from you in ages. You have a stupid bird that craps all over the place and shrieks bloody murder and you can't use it to get a hold of me? Or one of your giant pony wolves? Like... anything? I'm supposed to just know you want to talk to me?
Hold on, let me work on my psychic mind reading powers.
[He closed his eyes and held his hand out, like he was scanning Jon.]
My name is Jon. I'm too uptight and I don't know anything...
[Jon's fingers clench and unclench compulsively at the words, even though the burns on his hand are all gone. His jaw sets, angrily.]
What was stopping you, then? I've been busy too, Stiles. [You know, trying to run a guard that mostly hates him, trying not to get literally stabbed in the back again, trying not to wind up accidentally nude in front of Lady Maleficent a third time: it's a full-time job, and then some.]
Uh huh. So you're busy. I'm busy. Everyone's busy. Too busy to mention new wizards coming in. But hey, that's okay. You guys probably get along with him better, right? I mean, god...
[It's not like Dave had bled or lived with these guys for almost a year. It's not like Dave cared. Or had sponge bathed Jon. Or made a Christmas tree for Sansa. Or gone to get Bran and Robb when they needed a lift. No. But he was better, right? right.]
Well, with the whole Unseelie-Seelie split thing... I don't want anything to happen to her here because she's got some stupid shard in her chest that says she's on the other side when she's been fighting for us.
I received the queen's permission when first she came. Malia is welcomed here no matter what happens out there, it's her home. [Apparently Jon really should have actually told people when he did that. He got all gussied up for it and everything, all official-like!]
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I know many men here who use swords. And speak normally. [HE DOESN'T SOUND OLD] You're being unreasonable. He's not going to replace you, he offered his help and Sansa accepted it. [Meaning even if Jon wanted to (which he doesn't) he couldn't kick Dave out without going against Sansa's decisions.]
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[Okay, yes. He was hurt and kind of paranoid that they were trying to get rid of him. After he'd done so much? After he cared? Rude, guys.]
That's just... that's not how you do things, Jon!
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[So hurt. So offended.]
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[That was the sound of Stiles hanging up before he threw his locket across the room. He was having a childish fit of temper and feeling less than useless lately. This hadn't helped.]
you thought you'd seen the last of me BUT I FOUND SOME TIME
... >> Uh oh.
And then he just... pauses.]
Uh...
What's up?
rood i was expecting a warm welcome
But Stiles had reminded him what it meant to have friends to talk with, someone who wasn't family, someone he could look at without thinking you're dead, and you're dead, and they broke you, and you don't know it but you're fate is worse than any of the others. Only he lost that too because he thought Stiles had meant it when he went on about not caring about titles or court positions or things of that nature.
The problem being, of course, is that Jon is too prideful to just come crawling back with an apology. So instead he opens with:] If you didn't know, Gendry has been enchanting weapons with the magic the dwarves taught him in Troichean Beinn. [There. Magic things, officially reported to the court wizard.] With... fire, and such.
Oh, well, in THAT case -- /jumps on and humps
Now was one of those times.]
Dude...
[He wasn't sure if Jon was being condescending or trying to apologize. He should be better at figuring that out, but he was still just a teenager, as was Jon, and they could both be dumb.]
And?
aww yiss everybody goes down in an undignified lump on the floor
I thought you wished to know of such things. [He should have brought a pizza, clearly.] Or do you not wish to hear them from me? [Are u breaking up with him Stiles??]
who's mouth is that? who cares =D
[He huffed himself, moving away from the door, but pushing it open to indicate that Jon should come in.]
Look, I know what Gendry does. That's not my thing. He's got the whole sword thing down, just like you've got the whole naked wolf thing down. Whatever. That's not the point. The point is that...
Look, it's like this. You call in a plumber to do a job on your house, right? And you contract this plumber to do your house every time there's a problem. So the plumber's driving by your block one day and sees you have another plumber parked outside and some new guy is just... touching all your pipes.
You get it?
;) not i, friend
... What is a plumber?
Oooh yeah... /busts through your... wall?
Okay, stables, then. You do horses. You have the head horse guy doing his horse thing and someone else is coming around feeding the horses something new. That's basically what this comes down to, okay? It's not about titles. It's--
This is my job, okay? This is why I came here, with you and Sansa and Gendry and Arya and Malia. I came here to do my magic... thing to try to do what I can for you. I've been trying to figure out stuff, practicing magic extensions with my shard, I've been trying, man. And it's not even that this guy's here. It's that no one thought to say "hey, maybe we should see if Stiles is doing something like this or if these guys are compatible". You just... you brought in someone to do what I'm supposed to be doing. That makes me pretty superfluous, bro.
stop this is getting way too hot tbh
so take off all ur clothes?
[Only since the Dave incident.]
I was busy. I had to be over at Glaem learning how to do the whole... thing. Did you know I can make it so you can't get hurt by a sword? Did you? Bet you didn't.
[He might have, if it had been brought up. But wishes and fishes and blah blah blah. Besides, Dave wore old man shoes. And he was older. There was clearly something wrong with him. =|]
nooo now i have to youtube it it's so catchy
You have. I've been trying. You bloody hung up on me last time we spoke, and before that you were avoiding me. [That gives Jon pause though. He remembers their first talk, in the hall. When all Stiles could do was blow bubbles with his staff.] That-- invulnerability potion?
Hahahahah
I was not avoiding you. I was working. What do you think I do all day, Jon, just watch what you do and then run away when you're looking for me? Maybe scratch my butt all day?
And no. It's not that. It's from my shard. But I've been working on that too. All I've been doing since I've come here is try to... make it all better.
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So you're too busy working to have a conversation, but you're angry because men don't talk to you. [Jon is this close to throwing up his hands in frustration.] Aye, I know it. I never said you weren't doing enough.
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Hold on, let me work on my psychic mind reading powers.
[He closed his eyes and held his hand out, like he was scanning Jon.]
My name is Jon. I'm too uptight and I don't know anything...
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What was stopping you, then? I've been busy too, Stiles. [You know, trying to run a guard that mostly hates him, trying not to get literally stabbed in the back again, trying not to wind up accidentally nude in front of Lady Maleficent a third time: it's a full-time job, and then some.]
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[It's not like Dave had bled or lived with these guys for almost a year. It's not like Dave cared. Or had sponge bathed Jon. Or made a Christmas tree for Sansa. Or gone to get Bran and Robb when they needed a lift. No. But he was better, right? right.]
Whatever. Malia and I should leave here anyway.
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